Because tomorrow is not promised

One day I took my daughters to the park, It was beautiful out. The birds were singing, the wind was fresh, the girls were so happy and that made me smile.

I sat down while the girls eagerly ran to play and after a few minutes a mom came to the bench and asked if she could sit next to me, I gladly said yes. After a few minutes sitting there on her phone, her daughter said ” Mom please come play, you are always on your phone. You never play with me!”.

The mom didn’t even look up at her daughter.

I look around at what might as well have been a cell phone store, only one mom wasn’t on her phone… you’re thinking great!! No, she was on her iPad. There was no more happy parents playing, no more children seeking their parents for fun, no more interaction. Why are we doing this to our children?  What in the world? I had never noticed it like this before.mth

Here I was feeling sad for this little girl who was being ignored for a piece of plastic, In my head I was saying all sorts of things about the mom and “how dare she ignore her child…” when I felt in my heart a little stab, it was a bit painful. I knew that I was about to learn something special that moment. I heard a voice inside me say” How can you judge this mother, look down”. When I looked down, there in my hands was my phone. I was doing the EXACT thing and was judging.
Phone in hand ready to log on to Facebook to write about, how much I love my daughters and family blah blah. I felt so guilty, so sad. Is that how my daughters see me? Is that how they felt?  Romans 8:26 “ In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans”. My weakness? investing time on all things except my calling as a mom. With easy ways to get distracted as FB, IG and even Pinterest with stuff I’m most likely not going to make, ever.  the-truth-warrior-smartphone
The holy spirit convicts us of different things, its not the same for everyone at the same time but eventually the goal is for all of us to be ONE spirit with ONE mind to be pure and holy, for God is holy.                                                                          .One goal.
The holy spirit along with God’s word is what will lead us to victory in all we do. So when the Holy spirit seeks me, I listen and as much as I dislike being told to change things, I do it. It takes practice and perseverance but eventually it becomes weightless and the next thing we know we feel better, getting closer to where God wants us. Yes, even about a phone.

All the times I ignored my daughters to reply to a childlike facebook argument, to see who is less intelligent by fighting through the internet ( I won most times, sad huh?), the time I took to look up useless things, the times I didn’t pay attention to their needs because at the moment technology and a piece of PLASTIC was more important that what God had given me to be an example to. That broke me. I know people who don’t have trouble with facebook/tv/technology and are rarely ever on it but for me that wasn’t the case with FB and internet use. I hate TV. So I know this isn’t for everyone. But if you find yourself in my shoes, take action. You’ll thank God later and so will your family.

My husband picked up magic tricks instead of his phone. Our daughters think hes David Copperfield haha
My husband picked up magic tricks instead of his phone. Our daughters think he’s David Copperfield 🙂
That same night, I will not forget because my oldest, as I sloped next to her in bed with my phone in hand (something I had been doing for YEARS), said ” Mom, why do you like your phone so much, can you hug me?”.

As she gave me a hug, I felt like it was time, this was confirmation from what had witnessed earlier that day, to let go off the things that are taking time and real experience’s away from my family, myself and most importantly God. Who say’s we have tomorrow? Is it not God who gives it? This is how I was going to spend time with my daughter’s while awake and while I put them to rest? The fist thing they see is me on the phone, the last thing they see is me..on my phone. I can now say that for the past 7 months (my husband has done the same) and we both now sing our daughters to bed, without them asking for a hug and no phone, not even in the same room. For tomorrow is not promised and we gave out best that day and night to them and each other. As a married couple we have grown so much since deciding to turn off our tv and phones. We have grown to love the time we have today, that night.

Back to school shopping and I believe this was the only time I touched my phone that day! I've gotten do much better.
Back to school shopping and I believe this was the only time I touched my phone that day! I’ve gotten so much better.
Going back to basics, giving my daughters more time, spending more time with God. We don’t notice how Media, technology (if not used wisely) can rob your family and God, our children’s memories, time that we could be using to learn something new, time we could invest in face to face interaction rather internet or text. Time with my darling husband.

I found out who really missed me once no one could post ” Lets hangout, I miss you” on my Facebook wall, but most importantly time with God. I felt a big warm feeling in my heart giving up all these things and I gained so much more. The thought that my daughters had to see their mom on Fb and texting more than seeing her help others or even doing something productive makes me sad. I was to busy keeping busy that I was blinded to what was really important. Romans 12: 2 “ Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will”. I know that the verse is much deeper that this shallow stuff but I applied it to even the smallest areas of my life and its amazing how true it is. You’d be surprised at the reactions I get when people find out I just started a FB again after deleting it for a couple years, or I call them to say hi or to show up at their door to interact. All I can say is I am free of a burden. I’ve learned how to use media, I am free from something that is normal in society that we don’t even realize how bad it truly might be. I am free to run around in the park with my ladies, to make memories and keep them in my heart and not a status.

Milkshakes and silly faces. They are worth it.
Milkshakes and silly faces. They are worth it.

I will never claim to be better, I have gotten so much better about this and everyday I struggle less and less to not be on my phone for unplanned reasons. My family hasn’t been been the same since we have decided to do this and that alone let’s me know it was the right thing, even when people did call me crazy and extremist. #rebel haha

My marriage is worth it. This is us at the Cougar Campgrounds.
My marriage is worth it. This is us at the Cougar Campgrounds.

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