Ladies, am I the only one?
Am I the only one who believes they are just a tab bit more of a parent than their husband because they are with the kids all day?
Do you tend to interrupt your husband when he’s being… a parent?
Do you find yourself playing mommy to your husband?
Do you think/feel you’re the parent that truly knows how to parent?
How about when he disciplines, do you chime in?
This blog is for you my friend.
Also for me because I always write about what I struggle with.
A while ago my husband frustrated told me that I undermined him way to much and that came as a surprise to me… really. I didn’t see it as undermining, but as my idea is better because I’m with the kids more often and I know them. So I was a bit taken back and in my head I thought, “geez, he’s taking it far to personal here, why?!”.
After thinking about it and examining my every word and action for a few days I came to the conclusion that I wasn’t letting go and letting Dad. But why? Then I realized that I wasn’t allowing my husband to lead or to teach because I was scared he would somehow mess up everything I’ve worked hard to teach my children. We live in a generation where fathers are the dumb ones and they also need a mom/wife to guide them. Have you noticed this in cartoons, tv shows and movies?
This is far from the truth in many cases. We as wives have put ourself a in a mom position to even our husbands and many times our husbands hate it but don’t share it. Underminding everything they say. I don’t know about you, but if someone was constantly telling me what to do, what not to do, how to do it or that everything I did was wrong, I’d be so mad!!! Somehow I ended up doing all that to my husband with parenting.
Every father has something to offer, and it all looks different. My husband has something to offer and it is different than what I have to offer. And that’s a good thing! I’m just still working on catching myself letting go and letting Dad.
I tend to be a control freak when it comes to my children and those things I just mentioned above in the beginning? I’ve said in front of my children to my husband when he disciplines them or even tries to breath around them. I know, I know, it’s wrong. Truly I know but it’s so dang HARD to let go and let my husband parent.
This can cause a lot of damage in a marriage.
This can lead our children to not respect Dad..
I feel so blessed to have a husband who taught me to love nature. Who takes us out to hike and teaches us all about different plants and animal track that I don’t even see. My husband might not teach a “subject” in our homeschool but he’s the nature guy for us and we learn so much from him. I appreciate his ability to teach certain thing. He’s good at it and I’m not. Encouraging our husbands to talk/teach/share( not just for homeschoolers) what they are passionate about to our children, builds admiration from our children to Super Dad. It humbles us as wives to be ok with not knowing everything, to let go and let Dad. I love the twinkle in the girls eyes when they see that daddy knows a lot.
“Daddy is so smart!”. That makes me happy.
It’s really neat to have a husband who knows the world so well, whenever we go hiking he fills our daughters minds with knowledge. I my friends couldn’t tell one branch from another, but he can,this man knows his way out of the woods. It’s always very educational and I’m feeling thankful for what he can provide for our family. Not only for school but as the leader of our home.
What are somethings your husband teaches well? Or subjects he is passionate about that he can teach the kiddos? After you find out, allow him to do so and praise him for it! Next time your husband disciplines allow him to have his rules obeyed.
If your husband seems irrational then you talk about it in private. But search your hearts as to why you’re so needing to be in control of parenting and teaching. Why you feel you can’t let go and let Dad.
Friends it’s hard for people like me but I know how rewarding it is to let go and allow your husband to lead as he’s intended.