I’m Christian, and I love Jesus. I believe men are the head of the home and should be respected. I also believe that the wife has just as much saying as the husband, that God gave us, women natural instincts on what we should do during pregnancy, labor and post-baby. Though sadly many are losing that instinct due to many reasons that I won’t get in to on this blog.
He designed us to know deep in our hearts what to do and husbands should support and love their wives through it. Hospital births, c-sections, free birth, homebirth or any birth needs support. Ladies, it’s not anti Christian to educate your husbands on birth. It’s not rebellious to sit our husband down and explain (or show him birth videos of what to expect) what your birth plan is. It’s not taboo to talk about the woman’s body with your husbands. Being in mom groups makes me sad sometimes for the women who have husbands that:
1) shame the body of a mother, “you don’t look like you did before.”
2) won’t touch their pregnant wives because they are gross and huge.
3) are anti breastfeeding because her breasts will get saggier…
4) won’t watch the birth of their child because it’s, “gross.”
5) expect a new mom to be all sexy and available 24 hours after birth because a certain celebrity was.
6) wont have an open mind to educating themselves on their wives lower region after birth.
7) doesn’t truly see the power and beauty of a birthing mother.
8 ) wont let their wives make the choice of how she wants to birth or where. <<< So many women ask me, “how did you convince your husband to let you do a homebirth?”… let me? uhhh because I’m the one giving birth, the end. Ok, maybe I wasn’t that rude but the sassy part of me says this in her head.
I’m so sad that we are in 2018 and men are STILL in the dark of how amazing a woman’s body is. Unfortunately some men have no issue watching pornography or a woman’s vulva up close. But then have an issue when a woman is having a child, the most AMAZING thing is the world. Only then is a woman’s body gross. Psh. We need to educate our husbands more… seriously makes me sad that it’s a taboo subject.
Chris has always been my #1 supporter. He’s always been open to learning all that is birth, pregnancy, and post baby body topics. He’s never called it gross. He’s never been grossed out to be all in to the moment of watching his children being born, he’s never told me that I, “can’t” birth our baby here or there. So thank you for supporting me 109% even when I mentioned eating my own placenta babe! I’ve always come to him with my reasons and research as to why I do what I do and he respects my reasons. >> His points, opinions and concerns are always heard but ultimately we agree that a mother’s instinct is powerful and it’s a gift from God. Loving me and trusting me more each and every baby we’ve had. Even when we’re 4 babies in and my body isn’t what it was. Even when he’s had to share our bed with every single baby we’ve had for two years each. When I’ve breastfed past the, “ewww to old,” age. He cheers me on to keep going one more month. Yup, I’m still BF Desmond at 19 months. The late nights he’s rubbed my belly waiting for his baby. The early mornings when I would just stay up with cracked nipples from breastfeeding our first baby at 16. Taking the time to learn ways to help during birth. We need to expose men to the reality of birth. It’s NOT normal for men to only see the pretty side of a woman… whatever that means.
I hear women ALL the time ask me, “how did you convince him to trust your choices?”. So many women are hesitant to even bring up natural living to their husbands because everything natural is a scam… that makes no sense to me. Why aren’t they skeptical about all the chemicals? Don’t even get me started on that topic… It’s our job (with wisdom and love) to expose them to all that’s life! Research, ask questions, and educate yourself first. Pray, always. Ask God to give you wisdom on how to bring it up. How to present it. Also pray that God makes a way to what’s right not just what you want.
Men.. please trust your wives with the miracle of life. Be open minded and ready to learn. Don’t make your wife feel ashamed to talk to you about her body. The same way a Christian woman prays for God to help her love and respect her husband.. that same way you should be praying for your heart to love, support, trust, and encourage your wives during the most beautiful part of her life.
I pray everyday that I’m the wife he needs and everyday my husband does the same. He prays he’s the husband I need especially during this beautiful part of life.